Etiquette, manners, and beyond! In this bonus episode, Nick and Leah answer listener questions about napping guests, removing price tags on gifts, leaving toilet lids up, and much more. Please subscribe! (We'd send you a hand-written thank you note if we had your address.)
QUESTIONS FROM THE WILDERNESS:
THINGS MENTIONED DURING THE SHOW
YOU ARE CORDIALLY INVITED TO...
Producer & Editor: Nick Leighton
Theme Music: Rob Paravonian
Nick: Hey, everybody, it's Nick Leighton.
Leah: And I'm Leah Bonnema.
Nick: We had so many great questions from you guys in the wilderness-
Nick: -that we have a bonus episode. So, here we go. Our first question is: "I have a pet peeve, which is guests having a nap in the living room. The main culprits are my dad, and my uncle; both extremely tall men who take up a lot of space. This typically happens after lunch, when others are still enjoying a chat. I tell them no napping in the living room and that they can nap in a bedroom. The question is: is it rude to nap at a social family event in front of everyone, or is it just me that has a problem with this?"
Leah: This made me laugh so hard because so many people in my family nap in public areas.
Nick: Okay. Yeah, it's a thing. Yeah, and it's typically, I feel like, uncles, and dads that do this.
Leah: [Giggling] Yes, exactly. it was my grandfather. They were just passed right out on the couch. So, I immediately have a warm feeling about it because I would love to see him drive in and then take a nap on the couch.
Nick: I guess the question is: is this napping, or is this passing out? That's my first question.
Leah: You mean for her?
Nick: Well, just in general, because how deliberate is this? Is this sort of like, "Oh, that was a great lunch, everybody. I'm going to go sit on the couch and take a nap deliberately," or is this just like, "I sat on the couch, and then I just fell asleep..."?
Leah: I mean ... Now we're talking about what is a nap, you know what I mean? Because I think many naps [Giggling] people just often fall asleep.
Nick: Because there's the detail in her question, which is that they're both extremely tall, and take up a lot of space. So, are they laying out on the couch?
Leah: That's what I visualized; they were laying out on the couch.
Nick: So, they're laying down on the couch.
Nick: It's not just like they're sitting in the easy chair and they fall asleep.
Leah: No, I think they're laying down on the couch.
Nick: If that's the case, then, yeah, go to a bed. Yeah, go to a bed. Because now I can't sit on the couch because Grandpa is taking up all the seats.
Leah: I know, but isn't it so cute when Grandpa takes up all the seats, and you're like, "Pop-Pop, you're the cutest!"
Nick: Is he snoring, or no?
Leah: You know how some people do like a heavy breath that kind of pops the lip on the way out?
Nick: [Giggling] Okay. Okay, why is our letter-writer bothered by this? Why do we think?
Leah: I understand why she's bothered. I don't want to minimize her ... I always- I love about us that we just tell people, "Be bothered! Let it out. You're stifling your bother!"
Nick: Yeah, you're welcome to be bothered. I think that's fine, but I guess, what about this is actually making her bothered?
Leah: I think she's bothered that they're hijacking the room.
Nick: It's they're hijacking the room. So, it's not like a social thing that they're checking out of a social event that she wants them to participate in.
Leah: No, because she's saying, "Go nap in the other room."
Nick: Right. So, it's just more that they're taking up space in the living room that I would rather have awake guests use.
Leah: Right. [Giggling]
Nick: Okay, that's fair. So, what do we do about this?
Leah: I feel like she's already said, "Could you go nap in the other room?" and they don't.
Nick: Yeah, and they're like, "No, thank you. I'm good here."
Leah: Yeah, "I'm gonna sleep here with people around me talking because I find it comforting."
Nick: Now, could we just slip caffeine into the dessert?
Leah: You could slip caffeine into the dessert. My guess is that this is an afternoon nap.
Nick: I mean, most naps would be afternoon because, if it's after dinner, is that considered a nap?
Leah: No, then it's just an early bed.
Nick: Right. Yeah, exactly. So, I think you're allowed to be bothered. I think you might want to just reframe this as this cozy experience that Leah wants to have.
Leah: [Giggling] That I want to force upon you. Also, don't leave the room. If you want to continue to sit there and watch TV, or have a family ... And somebody passes out, just keep doing what you were doing.
Nick: What about bear traps on the couch?
Leah: I mean, that would work.
Nick: Pigeon spikes.
Leah: Wow. These are all ideas that I didn't think of, and now that you brought them up, I think yes!
Nick: I mean, just putting it on the whiteboard ... I think pigeon spikes is on the table. Something to consider.
Leah: I mean, what do you think?
Nick: Electrified? [Giggling] That's an idea. So, there's that.
Leah: Did I ever tell you, my friend growing up- they had horses ... I had a lot of friends with horses, before anybody writes me, who's listening to this, who's a friend, and said, "Was that about me?" because it wasn't.
Nick: Everyone had a horse.
Leah: I was climbing over the fence, and it was an electrified fence, but it was off, to go in the paddock with the horses, and her dad threw on the shock of the- he electrified the fence so hard that it knocked me off, and then he laughed for like 10 minutes.
Nick: So, you were purposely electrified?
Leah: Yeah, and I never climbed over that fence again. So ...
Nick: Yeah, I think you've learned your lesson. Wow!
Leah: I mean, if she electrified her couch, that would work.
Nick: That would ... [Laughing] Okay. Way to relate that to something in your life, Leah. Okay.
Leah: I didn't mean to bogart the story-
Nick: Our next-
Leah: I don't think we've answered it, Nick!
Nick: What is there to say? Either be bothered, or don't be bothered, but it seems like they're going to nap regardless, so that's the reality.
Leah: Yeah, they are going to nap regardless, and I just feel-
Nick: Yeah, so get on board, or don't get on board, but it's happening.
Leah: It is happening. They're nap-attackers.
Nick: If you don't want it to happen, then I think we have to electrify, or use pigeon spikes. Those are your options. So, our next question is: "I need help navigating gift giving at the office during the holidays. I had been taught that it was good etiquette to gift downward, thanking those who work under one's supervision for a job well done, and never to gift upward, as it could be seen as an attempt to curry favor with the boss. However, I've also read that you should just follow whatever your office culture is. When I started my job a few years ago, I asked around, and people said that in our office of about 20 people, each department exchanges within their own group, meaning you'd only exchange with four other people. So, I was embarrassed when the holiday season came, and I received a gift from coworkers outside of my group that I hardly ever see. Of course, they were thanked profusely, and I may have said something to the effect of, "Oh, I didn't know we were exchanging today," and then I quickly went shopping and got them something for the next day. Then I made a mental note to add them to my list for next year. Fast forward a few years, and I still can't see the pattern. I don't want anyone to feel left out, but I also don't want to resort to the dreaded stash of chocolates, and candles that I've wrapped and hidden under my desk, just in case, with a pen on the floor to write their name on the gift tag as I stoop under my desk to retrieve it. Am I putting anyone in an awkward position by being the first to give them a gift, if we haven't exchanged gifts in the past? P.S. We tried a Yankee swap and it went horribly." Wow.
Leah: Wow. I would like to say, and this is not going to be the last time that I say this on this episode, but it is the first-
Leah: Our listeners are very considerate, and lovely people.
Nick: Oh, sure!
Leah: I feel, A) as somebody who gets very anxious about things like this, I feel like I wish I could soften the anxiety around it because she just so wants to be kind and everybody to be happy, and it's created this anxious cloud. I get it. I just want to say you're super kind and considerate.
Nick: Yes. I love the idea that, under her desk at the office, there are all these gifts that are wrapped with blank cards, and she's just waiting for someone to ambush her. Then, she'll go under her desk and pretend to reach for one, write their name in immediately, and then be like, "Oh, here's the gift that I already purchased for you!" That's clever!
Leah: I mean, she's clearly brainstormed it. She's got all the ideas!
Nick: Yeah, that's amazing that there's this selection of candles under her desk.
Leah: Also, she's used the "Oh, I didn't know we were exchanging gifts today," which I think everybody has used.
Nick: Good line. Good line. I'm really actually disappointed about this postscript about the Yankee swap because I thought, oh, that's actually not a bad idea-
Nick: -because what is happening in this office is mayhem and chaos.
Leah: It's chaos.
Nick: Totally. I think the idea that you should follow whatever your office culture is, I think that's totally true. In this office, the culture is that we actually just give gifts to everybody, and we pretend that we don't, but we really do.
Leah: [Giggling] Yes.
Nick: I think you just need to accept the fact that, yeah, you have to give a gift to everybody. That's it ... People you don't work with; people you see once a year - they get a gift. That's your office culture. So, I think that is the answer to this question. It's not ambiguous. That's what it is.
Leah: I just wanted to talk about, up top, when she says, "Gifting downward," and "Gifting upward." I do think ... She's saying, "Gifting upward ... as it would seem to attempt to curry favor with the boss." I never saw gifting "upward" that way. I always saw it as - and I know this isn't the question, but I just wanted to add it - as thanking people for having you.
Nick: Yeah, I think it can be that. I mean, I think it depends on what the gift is. If you're giving your boss something very elaborate, and it makes them think that there's subtext with this gift, well, then, yeah, that's probably a problem, but if it's just like a "Oh, I baked cookies this weekend. Here, boss!" [crosstalk]
Leah: Yeah, that's what I was thinking it was.
Nick: "Here are some cookies!" I don't think that's a "Please promote me next quarter."
Leah: Right. I also realize, because I work in freelance, for me, it's thanking people that-
Nick: Who is your boss?
Leah: So, I love to buy myself stuff.
Nick: [Giggling] Right?
Leah: But it's also sort of just thanking people that I've worked with.
Nick: Yeah, "Thanks for this year. This was great." It's also about just keeping the relationship going for next year, especially when it's sort of workwise.
Leah: Right. So, that's how I think of all gifts at work. "Wonderful year. Great to see you. Great to work with you. Great to work in the same building with you," across the board, whether it's up, or down, you know what I mean?
Nick: Yeah, I can see that. Yeah. I think, for this year, I like a good homemade gift for everybody. I think, let's do some holiday baking, and let's just bake cookies, and put five in a cellophane bag tied with a nice ribbon, and we give that to everybody. Doesn't have to be expensive, but it's nice, it's thoughtful, it's homemade. It's in the spirit of the season. I think we just give that to all 20 people. A little bag of cookie - everybody gets the same thing. Just do it.
Leah: You could even- I love this idea, and I'm going to expand on it.
Leah: You could even try making homemade candy, which I did last year.
Leah: Just as something wild, and then, give that out to everybody.
Nick: So, I'll see your candy, and I'll raise you.
Leah: Raise me!
Nick: A chocolate truffle.
Nick: I was thinking some nice chocolate truffles - box of four with a nice little ribbon - very nice.
Leah: That is very nice. That way, the nights that you decide to make it, you could put on a fun apron, throw on some Christmas music, take that time to just dance around the house.
Nick: [Giggling] Okay, you've really kinda painted the scene there. Have you done this before?
Leah: No, I wanted to paint the full scene. That's what I love about the holidays. Or like, let's just light some candles that smell like balsam, and then we'll put on a fun apron, and maybe even a hat; maybe a Santa hat-
Leah: -and then, we'll cook stuff.
Nick: So, I think that is your solution. As for the question of: is it awkward to give somebody a gift before they give you a gift, I guess? Is that what she was asking?
Nick: Something along those lines ... In this office, because it is total anarchy with the gift giving, I think even if they haven't given you a gift, give them this bag of cookies, this box of candy, this little thing of truffles. Just give it to them, and let it be awkward for them, if they want to give you a gift back or not.
Leah: Yeah, that sentence really definitely added to my feeling of what a wonderful person this was. I felt so bad that she felt so anxious because she feels bad if she gives it after, and she feels bad if she gives it before, you know what I mean?
Nick: Right. Yeah.
Leah: There is no not feeling bad!
Nick: Ideally, this office would just decide to do Secret Santa. That really would be the solution here.
Nick: But they have chosen anarchy. So, that's their choice, and they can live with it.
Leah: Then, of course, if you have some very close friends at the office, you meet up after hours, and you give them whatever.
Nick: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. If you have office friends that you actually want to give real gifts to, that's outside of this.
Leah: Not that a truffle isn't a delightful, real gift.
Nick: Well, it's all about more, not or.
Leah: More, yes!
Nick: Our next question - also Christmas-related: "Every year, we send out Christmas cards to a wide circle of friends and family, some of whom we are very close to and some of whom we are not. To those we are close to, I would like to write a more personal message. However, I feel like it's rude to write something personal in some cards and not others. The thought of writing something personal in every card is so overwhelming that I end up writing virtually the same thing in every card. The only difference being that I write Merry Christmas to those who celebrate Christmas, and Season's Greetings to those who do not. It is also possible, although I'll admit improbable, that while friends and family are visiting each other's homes, admiring each other's displayed cards, one of them could notice that some had longer messages than others. So, is it rude to write a personal message in some cards and not in others?"
Leah: This is why I said that it would not be the last time that I said it [Giggling] Here we are again, a very kind and considerate, thoughtful person-
Nick: Very, yes!
Leah: -worrying, all the way out, what if they write more to a closer friend or family member, which obviously we all would understand why you would want to do that-
Leah: -that it would hurt somebody's feelings. I want to say I'm there with you. These are the kinds of things to keep me up at night, as well.
Leah: But as a person outside of the question, I think it's okay to write longer messages [Giggling] to people that you want to write messages to.
Leah: If somebody is so bold as to be like, "I was it Aunt Rachel's house, and I noticed that you wrote more to Aunt Rachel ..."
Nick: That would be amazing.
Leah: That would be-
Nick: That would be ...
Leah: A) let us know if that happens [crosstalk]
Nick: Yeah. If that happens, I expect to get a text message from you immediately, people.
Nick: Absolutely. I want to hear about that in real time. Put me on the phone with her.
Leah: Yeah, please [Laughing] because what kind of a person?
Nick: Now, I will say, I have actually had this thought, and I have been at other people's homes, where I did see what cards of mutual friends were sent to them, and whether or not the card was as nice as the one that was sent to me. It was just something I noted; wasn't something I was bothered by; wasn't something I sort of put down in a ledger, but I definitely noted it, so I get where she's coming from. She's not the only person that has this feeling.
Leah: Oh, no, I get where she's coming from.
Leah: That's what I'm saying. I feel the anxiety. But I do think, as an outside person, that you can write what you want to write.
Nick: Yes, for sure. I think the number of people on your list that will go to a mutual friend's house, note your card, note the length of the message on that card, and compare it to the card you sent them - very small; a very few number of people is this going to be a problem for, and you know who these people are in your life?
Leah: You absolutely know.
Nick: You know who's on that list; who's going to be bothered by this. For those people, write an essay. 10,000 words, no problem.
Leah: Or, for those people, don't write anything because they're causing you so much stress. [Giggling] I will admit that I usually have three working cards. One of my favorite things to do, I do it every November ... I go to Barnes & Noble, and they have a card section, and then they have cards done by children, and they raise money for Amnesty International.
Leah: I will usually get three different sets of cards, and then two differents of those, and then one that's like a funny card. Irrelevant. But I do usually not send the same card to people who I know live in the same town or are related.
Nick: Yes, I actually make an effort to not send the same card to people who I think are going to see each other's cards. That's true.
Leah: But a lot of people send cards with pictures on it, so it's the same- everybody's getting the same card.
Nick: Yeah, I mean, I think it's also totally fine to send the same card out to everybody. So, let's not get into the weeds on that. It's totally fine to have one card for the season; that's what you just send to everybody, no problem.
Leah: Oh, I think it's absolutely, totally fine. That's what I was trying to start with. I'm just trying to relate to the anxiety.
Nick: Oh. Well, but you're saying that you also send three different versions and make an effort to send different versions to people who might see each other, which I also do. So, there are people out there who also try and make an effort to spice it up a little bit. There's different approaches.
Leah: I don't do a picture card. If I did a picture card, everybody would get the picture card.
Nick: That would be amazing, if you did a picture card, but you had multiple versions of the photo.
Leah: Let me tell you, as soon as we get hairless cats, which Dustin, and I have been eyeballing for a very long time, everybody will be getting a picture card, and it will be us and the cats in matching sweaters.
Nick: Can't wait.
Nick: Can't wait. So, I think we have answered this question.
Nick: You're doing great. You're doing a good thing. Don't worry about it. Write however much you want, it's fine. Our next question is: "I work in an office with about nine other women. There is a two-stall ladies lavatory. Sometimes, when I enter one of the stalls, the toilet seat lid is down. This bothers me so much because I wash my hands before using the lavatory, and I know that the person who put the lid down didn't wash her hands after using the bathroom, and touching the lid, so now I have to touch the lid before going. I do realize that this is also the case when touching the handle and the lock, but somehow the lid thing really bothers me. So, should we all be shutting the lid?"
Leah: And there's a P.S. "Will you say hi to Alice for me? She's the one who told me about your show."
Nick: Hi, Alice! Thanks for getting the word out!
Leah: Thank you, Alice! Hi!
Nick: So, I'm a little confused because, in my mind, I would just take a little bit of toilet paper, and then, with the toilet paper between me and the lid, I would use that to open the lid, so I didn't have to touch the lid.
Leah: Me, too. That's what I wrote - "Use T.P." - right next to it.
Nick: So, I feel like that would be what we would do. So, why aren't we doing that?
Leah: She may or may not be doing that. I think it's more- I read this more of it's like a general irritation that people are putting the lids down.
Nick: I see. So, the question here is: is it proper to leave the lid up or should it be put down?
Leah: That's what I think the question is-
Leah: -and I think a lot of people put the lid down because they think it will slow down the spray back from the flush.
Nick: People are concerned about spray? Is that what it is?
Leah: Well, I mean, a lot of public restrooms have extra water, so when you flush it-
Nick: [Laughing] Oh ...
Leah: -water comes out and sprays-
Nick: I mean ... Like a water fountain?
Leah: Like a water fountain!
Nick: It's like the Bellagio fountains? Is that what's happening?
Leah: Yes, it is the Bellagio, exactly. That's what's happening.
Nick: How lovely.
Leah: It's very glamorous ... But then, the seat's wet for the next person.
Nick: I mean ... What you're telling me is that, in many bathrooms you've been in, the spray is so aggressive that it gets the entire seat wet every time.
Leah: I'm saying that's plausible.
Nick: Okay. I feel like if the lid is down, same problem.
Leah: I don't put the lid down. Am I sharing too much? When the lid is down, I pick it up with some toilet paper.
Nick: Although, what public bathrooms have lids?
Leah: Most of them don't have lids.
Nick: [Giggling] Right?
Leah: That's why this rarely comes up.
Nick: Yeah. I feel like, in a private home, I think it's nice to leave the lid closed afterwards. I think that's a nice way to leave the bathroom.
Nick: So, I feel like that would translate. Yeah, I think, given the choice, I'm a lid-down person. I think we're going to close the lid afterwards.
Nick: So, I feel like I just maybe have a difference in opinion with this letter-writer about the state of lid-ness.
Leah: I think that, either way, a person ... If you walk in on the lid, you can use toilet paper.
Nick: Yes. That is your solution, if it was left in the position of down, and that wasn't your preference.
Leah: Then, as a follow up, Nick feels good about the lid down.
Nick: I feel very good about that. I feel like that is the default position. So, I'm going to go out on a limb, and I'm going to say that's correct.
Nick: I feel like we're going to get a lot of mail, which I'm prepared for.
Leah: Well, it's an interesting topic because, so often-
Nick: You have not weighed in on it! Where do you come down on this? No pun intended.
Leah: It doesn't ... [Squealing] It honestly doesn't enter my mind. If it's down, I use toilet- I don't touch anything in a bathroom without toilet paper.
Leah: I would toilet paper the whole bathroom - the walls, everything. I mean, I am-
Leah: I go in there; I clean it.
Leah: I hang toilet paper on the door. I'm serious. I mean, I'm serious about ...
Nick: Yeah, you leave, and there are sheets of toilet paper hanging down, like you're going through a meat locker.
Leah: [Giggling] I apologize to the trees, and I'm like, "Look, this is the only way I get through this."
Nick: Sorry. It's not you, it's me.
Leah: My issue with bathrooms is so different than this that I never even ... It's that I feel like women need to start with either not squatting, or squatting because we end up having to clean up after each other. It drives me crazy. If you're a woman, and you're squatting, and you're making a mess in there, the next woman has to clean up after you. It drives me crazy! If I actually just got to a bathroom where the lid was down and it was crisp, I would probably write a thank you note, you know what I mean?
Nick: [Giggling] Okay. Wow. Lots going on in the women's restroom.
Leah: As far as in my own home, I don't really notice.
Nick: I guess another way to approach it is just leave it how you found it. So, if it was down, I guess you would leave it down. If it was up, then I guess you would leave it up.
Leah: Yeah, if I was in somebody else's house, I would try to do that.
Nick: Right. Okay. I'd be curious to see what our audience thinks about this. Yeah, should the lid stay down, or should you leave it in the state you found it, or should it stay up? What's correct? Do a little survey.
Nick: Our next question is: "I have a question about removing price tags from gifts. I find myself tediously picking off stuck-on price tags, while trying to wrap gifts at midnight, the night before an event, or occasion. I've been taught to do this all my life. Thoughts?" Yeah.
Leah: Take 'em off.
Nick: Remove the stickers.
Nick: Yeah. I mean, I'm not quite sure what we're getting at, why we wouldn't - why wouldn't we do that? Who's not removing the price off of gifts? Is this something that's happening?!
Leah: I have come across a sticker where it seemed impossible to get off.
Nick: Yeah, like from TJ Maxx?
Leah: Or it's on the bottom of the thing, in which case, I take out a marker, and I just go over it so many times that you can't read through it.
Nick: Ah, okay, yeah. You want to just sort of Greek it out.
Leah: But you've got to get the price off!
Nick: I mean, we can do some Heloise Helpful Hints here. To get stickers off, I like to use a hairdryer. Gets the glue a little warm and then, that sometimes makes it easier.
Leah: Oh, nice!
Nick: Or, you can get a pencil eraser. Sometimes, that actually helps, if you use like an eraser. So, some ideas ...
Leah: Those are great ideas.
Nick: In terms of the etiquette, I think you don't want the price to be on it because the point of the gift is not how much you spent, it's how thoughtful it should be. Good gifts don't really have any relationship to the price that they are, and some of the best gifts I've ever gotten were definitely not expensive.
Leah: I agree 100 percent with Nick.
Nick: Although, the best gifts are the ones that are very expensive that are also very thoughtful. [Giggling]
Nick: Those are my favorite, but I'll take thoughtful over price any day.
Leah: Yeah, just take it off.
Nick: As long as we're on the subject, I know some people leave stickers on, in general. I have been to people's homes, and they had crystal goblets - very nice. Love a good crystal goblet - but they left the sticker on the bottom of the glass that says, "This is crystal." You should take those off. Yeah, you should not leave those on. Those are meant to be taken off.
Leah: I don't have any of that in my life.
Nick: You don't have crystal goblets, Leah Bonnema?
Leah: Nor do I go places with crystal, but I will say the one exception is a lot of people like to wear the ball cap-
Leah: -with the sticker on the front.
Nick: Yeah. I mean, that's a style thing-
Leah: That's a style.
Nick: -which I think that's not etiquette, at that point. That's just-
Leah: No, but I think some people are trying to carry that style over to their crystal.
Nick: Oh ... You think the sticker on your Baccarat is a style?
Leah: I also don't think it's that much of a heavy lift. Just take the sticker off.
Nick: Yeah. Yeah, just take it off. Yeah. I guess there is a world in which I want you to know how much I spent on the gift. I kind of want you to know how much I spent, so I think maybe some people do have that impulse, but here's the thing - I know how much you spent. I know. I know how much this thing is.
Leah: No, but I don't think that person was even asking that, though. "I find myself tediously picking off stuck price tags while trying to wrap gifts at midnight."
Nick: Oh ...
Leah: It's the peeling it off that's driving this person crazy.
Nick: Well, I mean, let's not wait until midnight the night before then.
Nick: Maybe we should maybe have better time management.
Nick: So ... That's an idea. Is that harsh? That's harsh.
Leah: No, it's funny.
Nick: [Giggling] So, yeah. I'd be really good at Price is Right. I know how much stuff costs. That Ford Fiesta? I know the sticker price. So, I'm ready. I'm ready for the Showcase Showdown.
Leah: I'd be so bad. I do bad with ages, prices ... Men's weight also blows my mind every time!
Nick: How often does that come up?
Leah: Every time you watch a sporting event.
Nick: Oh ... It has their stats in the corner?
Leah: Yeah, and you're like, "WOW!"
Nick: "Wow! He's 250 pounds?! Amazing!"
Nick: I was gonna guess 20 pounds.
Leah: [Giggling] Yeah, really. I'm always way off.
Nick: Okay. [Giggling] The last thing- I want to talk a little bit more about the cheese plate in France, because there's this other topic, which I didn't mention in that amuse-bouche a few weeks ago, which is adding butter to your cheese, which is a thing that I've seen happen, but I wasn't entirely sure what the etiquette was, and it's not really well covered. I actually reached out to this journalist in Paris, Florence Villeminot. She's with the France 24 network. I was like, "Flo ... Help me understand what is up with butter and cheese." She says some people do eat butter with their cheese, but there's a very big debate about whether or not this is okay. She says it tends to be very salty butter, and it tends to be paired with a hard cheese, like a Comté, but she says it can also, "Add a creamy, and salty kick to a Camembert that's lacking a bit of flavor." So, it's controversial. I guess if you're at a dinner party, and there is butter on the table, clearly, we know where your host falls on this debate, so you can go ahead and do it, but just know that this is a controversial topic. I think it's interesting that French people not only eat a lot of cheese, but they will also add butter to it.
Leah: They're also always so in-shape looking.
Nick: Well, because it's all about portions. They're not eating sticks of butter. It's like a thimble; like a teeny tiny bit.
Leah: It always comes down to portions.
Nick: Yes, that's it.
Leah: Not my skill set either. Add that to the list of men's weights, guessing prices, and ages, portion size ... [Laughing] I think it is phenomenal.
Leah: I love this about you, among the many things I love.
Nick: Sure, let's list them!
Leah: That you reached out to Flo!
Nick: Oh, sure. Yeah. No, she's actually great. If you actually are interested in French etiquette, she has a whole television program that you can find on YouTube - I'll link to it in the show notes - which is about different etiquette topics in France.
Leah: So cool!
Nick: I learned a lot about cheese from her, and I kinda wanna be best friends with her now. If you tweet at her on Twitter, she'll write you back about cheese, or whatever.
Leah: So great.
Nick: I'm totally into Flo Villeminot, these days. So, Flo, be my friend. We want to be yourfriend, and answer your questions. Send them to us!
Nick: Send them to us through our website, wereyouraisedbywolves.com, or you can send us a text message, or leave us a voicemail, (267) CALL-RBW (267-225-5729). We'll see you next time!
Nick: À bientôt!
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