Outrunning Your Friends, Bragging About Possum Sweaters, Renaming Your Coworkers, and More

Nick: Hey everybody, it's Nick Leighton.

Leah: And it's Leah Bonnema.

Nick: And we had so many great questions from you all in the wilderness ...

Leah: [howls]

Nick: ... that we have a bonus episode. So here we go. Our first question is, quote, "What is the etiquette of racing with friends? I signed up to run a 5K race as part of an upcoming friends weekend. I'm very excited about this kid-free fun weekend. With some time to prepare, I've been training and I'm getting faster and stronger. On race day, would it be rude for me to not stay with my friends and just run my own race? Is there a most polite way to say, 'Have fun, see you at the finish line,' or am I supposed to keep the spirit of a friends weekend and stay with a group even if I feel like going ahead? To be fair, some or all of them may be faster than I am."

Leah: A), this is so fun.

Nick: Yeah, love a 5K.

Leah: Is this a phrase for a reason? "Run your own race."

Nick: Sure. Yeah. I mean, that's a phrase that exists. Right.

Leah: I just think that we should tell our friends in advance what we're thinking.

Nick: Yes, that's the key. We cannot get to the starting line and just be like, "Bye!"

Leah: So I just think we talk about it in advance. So it's not like a day of.

Nick: Yeah, I think the night before, like, "Oh, so excited for the race tomorrow. I've been really training, really hope to get a good time. And so I may run ahead, but definitely I'll see y'all at the finish line, or maybe you'll see me at the finish line."

Leah: Well, I think our letter-writer also thinks that they're all faster than her.

Nick: Yes. I think the point is we're all at different levels, or we're not sure what levels we are, and that's fine. I mean, it'd be like if we went skiing together and I was like, "Oh, you're a beginner skier, but you're obligated to do the double black diamond slope with me." Like, no, we do not have to do the same thing. We can do the thing that is our ability. And that is fine. And this is part of a friends weekend. So this is just one part of the friends weekend. And so you're doing all the friend stuff, you're doing all the togetherness already. This is just one moment where you're like, "Oh, I'm just gonna run a little faster."

Leah: Also, as somebody who rarely jogs but has run things in the past, I do not want anyone near me.

Nick: [laughs] Oh, okay.

Leah: Because I get so aware of my breathing and, like ...

Nick: Oh, it makes you self-conscious?

Leah: Yeah, I just want to do what I gotta do. I want to listen to my music and zone in. Because then you tend to be like, "Are you okay? Am I holding you back? Did you want to go faster?" You know, I just want to—you know, isn't the sweat pouring from my upper lip bothering you? You know, I just want to be like, everybody do what they gotta do.

Nick: Yeah. Yeah, I definitely don't want to have to make conversation with you during the entire 5K. Like, I don't want to have to match your pace and, like, talk. [laughs]

Leah: Oh, I can't talk. I cannot talk.

Nick: I think one thing not to do though is gloat about your time. So if you finish in whatever time you finish, let's not make the whole rest of the day about, like, how well you did in comparison to how well everybody else did.

Leah: I mean, I think it's fine to feel proud of yourself for doing it.

Nick: Oh yeah, for sure. But let's not make other people feel bad for being slower.

Leah: I also don't even think we need to wait until that weekend to talk about it with our friends.

Nick: I think the default setting when we're all gonna do a 5K is that we all do the pace that works for us. Like, on some level, I don't think it needs to be discussed. Like, I think if the plan was we're all gonna stick together, that's what would need to be discussed.

Leah: Well, you would hope, but if our letter-writer's getting the vibe that that may be what people are thinking, I would deal with it sooner rather than later.

Nick: Yes. I guess if we're getting the vibe that, like, oh, we're all gonna be at the same pace, yeah, then bring it up. But I think the default setting for any race is that people run the race to the best of their abilities or desires.

Leah: And if you want to confirm that that's the default setting, you could always say, "Hey, I've been assuming that we're all sort of working at our own pace, running our own race, but let's make a plan for what we want to do afterwards together."

Nick: There we are. Very nice.

Leah: We got to the finish line.

Nick: Oh! So our next question is, quote, "When is the proper age to start calling someone Miss or Mister? I am 12 and some of my friends' friends are around 18, and that feels too young to call them Miss or Mister, because in my mind they're a kid. Some of the young adults in my theater group are around 25, and for some reason I still have a hard time calling them Miss or Mister because we are so close. I would love to know what you guys think."

Leah: I think we just ask people what they'd like to be called.

Nick: Yes, that is true. That is the proper etiquette approach when we're not sure how to address people.

Leah: So I think maybe we're not necessarily breaking it down by age, because you could have a very young teacher who wanted to go by their last name.

Nick: Yes. And I think that is the point, that the honorifics here, or the formality—the level of formality that we're talking about—that is about hierarchy a lot of the time. And so if you're 12 and you have a summer job and your boss is 18, yeah, you're gonna call them Mr. or Ms. until told otherwise, because that's showing respect for the hierarchy. And so age is definitely a factor sometimes, but it's really more about, like, what is the social hierarchy here, or what level of formality is required?

Leah: I immediately thought of it as like, when you're speaking Spanish and when you use ustedes and when you use tú.

Nick: Mmm?

Leah: Like, obviously with older people, like somebody's grandma, you would immediately just default to the more formal.

Nick: Right.

Leah: But other ones are gonna be based on what is the setting.

Nick: Yes. And you always want to start more formal and then get informal, you know, as the relationship develops, or if that's appropriate. I think we don't want to start informal and then move to the formal.

Leah: Yeah. I think people will say, "Oh no, call me Kathy."

Nick: And I think being part of the same theater group, I feel like that's a first name basis type of thing. I don't think we're saying. like, "Oh, Mr. Darcy, would you like to play Zip Zap Zop?" Like, no. This is—this is a little more casual.

Leah: Although if it was Mr. Darcy, I would say Mr. Darcy. But anybody else, I would use—yeah, if they were in my theater group, I would use first names.

Nick: Yeah.

Leah: Like, if I was meeting a new neighbor, I would go next door and I would say, "Hey, Ms. Sarasota, I just moved in next door." And then that would be up to them to say, "Call me Betty."

Nick: Right. Yeah, that is true, because yeah, we really don't know each other. We're not on a first name basis.

Leah: And I think that would be regardless of age, but the older they are, the more I would definitely use Mr. or Mrs. or Ms.

Nick: Yes. And I think what's interesting is I do feel like American society is getting more informal and we're seeing less and less of this, but I don't think we're ever gonna get to a point where, like, everybody's on a first name basis for everything. So I think there are going to always be places where we want to keep the formal alive, but it'll be interesting to see how this unfolds in the days and decades ahead.

Leah: I have noticed a lot of my friends who are teachers, instead of going by their last name, Mr. or Ms. or Miss, they use ...

Nick: Like Miss Leah?

Leah: Yeah, Miss Leah. My dentist ...

Nick: Goes by Dentist Bob?

Leah: He goes by Dr. David.

Nick: Dr. David. Okay.

Leah: And I kept using his last name, and then I realized oh, everybody else is saying Dr. David, so now I go Dr. David.

Nick: Okay. I mean, I guess if that's how he wants to be called, then that's great.

Leah: So I'm just following—I started with the most.

Nick: Right. Yes.

Leah: And then I'm changing based on what I'm being told by other people.

Nick: Yeah. And that is polite. So our next question is, quote, "My in-laws take a huge, very luxurious trip every year—two weeks in New Zealand, a cruise to Alaska, Venetian vacations, and now this year, a cruise to Antarctica. When they come visit soon, they will carry on and on about it for hours each day for days on end. What's the best way for me to redirect the conversation without offending anyone? I'm excited for them, but honestly, I'm starting to think that they only take these trips so they can tell everyone how amazing their life is. After every trip, the destination becomes their entire personality. When they returned from New Zealand, we heard about possum sweaters for a full year. You can't mention any single topic without them somehow redirecting it back to their travels. I don't think I have it in me to survive one more visit with them with this madness. Any advice? Maybe a few one-liners to cut it off when it starts? Help!"

Leah: Hello, possum sweaters!

Nick: So I had to look that up because I was not familiar with possum sweaters. Did you know what this was?

Leah: No, but I love how our letter-writer's like, "I don't want to talk about this anymore." And I was like, "But I need to talk about this a little bit."

Nick: I kind of want to talk about it.

Nick: Did you look it up? I looked it up.

Leah: Well, I immediately just assumed—I immediately visualized it and was like, "Oh, I get it." But I'm probably wrong.

Nick: Well, what did you think it was?

Leah: That we're making sweaters for possums.

Nick: [laughs] No. No, it is not that. No. No, we are making sweaters of possums. Yes, we are using possum fur and we are making sweaters out of it.

Leah: Okay. Well, I like that significantly less.

Nick: [laughs] Yes, we are taking possum fur and we're mixing it with some other material like merino wool and then we are making sweaters.

Leah: Well, I hope we're not hurting the possums.

Nick: Apparently in New Zealand where this is very popular, possums are sort of a problem. Like, there's just too many possums. And so this is one way they are addressing that.

Leah: Well, if we did it my way, we could be dressing that. Maybe they just need some warm sweaters and a little loving. I think they kill insects.

Nick: I don't think for the purposes of this question, we need to delve in deeper.

Leah: Okay. Well, now it made me sad.

Nick: Okay, well, I will provide you with the number of the New Zealand consulate here in New York, and you can send your thoughts.

Leah: Meanwhile, New Zealand would be like, "Why don't you handle your own business over there, okay?"

Nick: So what do we do about these people who go on elaborate vacations and can't stop talking about it?

Leah: I think I have absolutely the worst recommendation, so I feel like we should start with Nick.

Nick: Start with that.

Leah: I wrote, "Can we just zone out?"

Nick: Okay. Yes. Yes, we can. That is on the table.

Leah: Because, like, you know, I get why it's annoying. Like everything you bring up, they root it back to this.

Nick: Mm-hmm.

Leah: But, like, this maybe is the thing they look forward to all year, and then they're trying to share their—and even though it's like—so we could be like, I'm gonna write a movie and every time they start talking, I'm going to put light in my eyes and look like I'm listening, but then I'm just gonna start working on this movie in my head and then maybe see how long it takes me to finish it.

Nick: Oh, okay. Oh, so you're actually gonna be productive.

Leah: Yeah. Be productive with your time.

Nick: Yeah. I think we could zone out. I mean, I guess that is one way to send the signal that this is boring.

Leah: Oh no, no, no, no. We're not looking like we're bored. We're putting on the look.

Nick: Oh, we're pretend—okay. I got you, what you're saying. Okay.

Leah: We're not looking like we're bored. We are looking like an active listener.

Nick: I mean, that's hard to pull off.

Leah: Women have been doing this for centuries.

Nick: [laughs] Okay. Okay. Well, that's hard for me to pull off.

Leah: Yeah, men are not good at this.

Nick: Okay. All right. So this is an idea, listeners. Another idea I had was to try to find topics that are really hard to pivot off of back to travels. So anything at home, like home renovation projects, like, oh, is there anything new in your house? Because that is absolutely not about not being home. So what's going on inside of your house? Like, let's talk about that. Or neighborhood gossip, like, "Oh, last time you were talking about your neighbor and what they were doing, like, oh, how'd that work out? Like, are they still parking in front of your house?" So we could talk about things that are very local to them.

Leah: Well, I think our letter-writer probably also wants to share some stories about their life without having it rotate back to ...

Nick: Yeah. Well, then you definitely can't talk about your own travels.

Leah: Well, probably you can't talk about anything. People can relate anything to anything when they just want to talk. So what if the other option is we give them a stage to talk about it when they first get there? "Hey, let's sit down. Let's look at all your pictures on the iMac."

Nick: Mm-hmm.

Leah: You know, tell us about it. Maybe they'll get it out of their system.

Nick: Oh, do you think they can max out? Do you think there's a finite amount?

Leah: Well, then you've listened, you've actively listened, you looked at their pictures. So then moving forward, when they start to bring it up again, you'd be like, "Yes, I loved that story!" And then you just move into whatever you were talking about.

Nick: I like that instinct, but it does train them to think that you're interested and that you want more of this. You're training the algorithm to serve up more of this content.

Leah: But she's not not interested. She's just not interested constantly.

Nick: Right. I think there is a danger when we feed the beast a little bit that this becomes insatiable. So I would worry about that. But if you felt like, oh, we can just get it out of their system and then move on, then that would work. That would work.

Leah: But then you can also alleviate any feelings you may have about oh, I didn't give them the chance to talk about it. You did. It's happened. Now we can cut them off and go into our story.

Nick: Now what if we just try to one-up them and book a better vacation? And then we just talk about that.

Leah: Nick!

Nick: I mean, it's an idea.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: No?

Leah: It's an idea. Put it on the whiteboard.

Nick: I mean, they're going to Antarctica. I think you should do something that's bigger and better than that.

Leah: You're gonna go to the Arctic.

Nick: Yeah, we're gonna go to Svalbard. Yes.

Leah: You know, I've actually always wanted to go to ...

Nick: Svalbard specifically, or just the Arctic?

Leah: Just the Arctic in general.

Nick: Okay. Oh, do you know about Svalbard?

Leah: Tell me all.

Nick: I mean, oh, everybody should just look this up. Oh, it seems so great. I have a friend that went. It was like, oh, this is incredible. Yeah, it's right up my alley. It checks off so many boxes for me—danger from polar bears, international intrigue, cold weather. [laughs] You know, it has everything I need in a vacation.

Leah: I had the opportunity—I was gonna think, were we doing Wolves then? Yes, Leah, we've been doing Wolves since you were born.

Nick: Uh-huh?

Leah: If our listeners remember, I got to go to Greenland with the military to perform. And we weren't in southern Greenland, you know what I mean? This was not the south of France. We were up there. And so it was December, so it was just complete darkness 24 hours a day.

Nick: Right?

Leah: And so I missed a lot of it, but let me tell you, I did try to make friends with all the Arctic foxes, and they are adorable!

Nick: Nice. So yeah, I guess go to Greenland, letter-writer. That sounds more spectacular.

Leah: If we're doing Nick's idea. And then when they share something, you share something. They share something, you share something. But I mean, this really seems like we're going to all lengths to just—when we could have just zoned out and done the errands we have to do in our head.

Nick: And so our letter-writer wanted maybe a few one-liners to cut it off when it starts. Do we have any one-liners?

Leah: I mean, cutting off people when they're talking is sending a signal.

Nick: Yeah. I mean, I guess it could be just, "Oh my gosh, that sounded like such a great trip. So tell me about—" and then just pivot to something unrelated. "Oh, speaking of possums, we are having just the hardest time with raccoons getting into our garbage can again."

Leah: Yeah, I like that. Yeah, that works.

Nick: Right? I think we just pivot to save our territory, and we just have to make sure we never pivot to anything involving travel, travel-related, credit card points, logistics, leaving the house.

Leah: Oh, I'm sure these people don't need a direct line.

Nick: The Olympics.

Leah: I'm sure they will find a way to relate it back no matter what. So you're just gonna have to keep pivoting.

Nick: Yeah. I think we just do it with a smile and then we make a game of it. How much of a non-sequitur can we get away with? What is the wildest non-sequitur we could actually achieve?

Leah: And I think you always start with that. "I love that. That sounded amazing. You know what this reminds me of? I was just watching The Lord of the Rings. I mean, that's a very direct line, New Zealand to The Lord of the Rings. Obviously, everybody knows that.

Nick: Yeah, that works. So letter-writer, try that. Let us know how that goes. Try a hard pivot. Give it your best non-sequitur.

Leah: Give it your best non-sequitur with a smile.

Nick: So our next question is, quote, "Is this rude? There's a new employee at the office I work at part-time—let's call her Lisa. There are 12 of us here, not a large office with a lot of departments. Lisa says she's horrible with names and will call us something different. I suggest she pull up our website with all of our photos and names for reference. Lisa insists though, it doesn't matter. We will all have different names by the end of the week. She's already given the office manager a new name. Uh, excuse me? I am also bad at remembering names, but if I was given a tool, I would use it. A medical diagnosis was not offered. This is just, quote, 'how she is.' Is this rude that she can't be bothered, or am I being too sensitive?"

Leah: I was thinking about the amount of questions that we get that start with, "Is this rude?" And I would say it's a hundred percent yes. I was like, what is the percentage? It's always rude.

Nick: It is always rude. [laughs] Yes, it is never not rude.

Leah: Never not rude. And every time we're like, "Yes, so rude!"

Nick: Yeah, it's never been like, "Actually, we disagree. This is not rude, this is fine."

Leah: This is a for sure rude, an FSR.

Nick: Yeah, it's so rude. Yeah. And let's talk about why.

Leah: And I'm gonna talk about it as somebody—I really have trouble with names. I struggle. I meet so many people in different contexts. The way my brain works is that I will remember something about your life, something like a detail that's important, that like emotionally—but names, they're just slip sliding out. I would never be like, "Yo, I'm just gonna call you John now."

Nick: [laughs] Right! Yeah, this is rude no matter how you slice it, because what is not happening here is you're not making an effort. Lisa is not making an effort. And yes, we all forget names. We all do. Names are difficult because as you said, context. You know, when you run into somebody in a different context, like, yeah, it's really hard to put all the details together sometimes. But there are a lot of tricks for how we try to cover that up or just politely ask them to remind you. But we make an effort. That is not what is happening here.

Leah: No. And even in a place where, like, this is a job where it's gonna be the same people, we know the context, even then it's hard a lot. But then we don't just be like, "Well, this is your name now."

Nick: [laughs]

Leah: You just walk over and you say, "Hey." I mean, you don't have to be like—you can just go over and ask what your question is. You don't have to be like, "Hey, I'm now calling you Jack."

Nick: I mean, this is how we get office nicknames. So use a nickname. I mean, the only reason people call people "Sport" in the office is that we didn't know your name and then we got too far deep in the relationship and it was too embarrassing to ask you at a certain point, so now you're just Sport.

Leah: Or just don't be anything. Just ask your question or say hi.

Nick: Yeah. Like, just avoid the name. It is better to not use the name than use the wrong name deliberately.

Leah: Well, that's why this person I think is extra rude, because they want to, like, throw it in your face. I forget, I don't even care. I'll just rename ya, and we're all gonna be on board with that. If somebody did that to me and they thought it was funny, I would just stop responding.

Nick: Yeah. I mean, that's one option. Like, I'm just not gonna respond to this anymore. I think we can also just correct it every time and just be polite about it. Like, "Actually, my name is Nick."

Leah: This is the kind of person that's gonna be like, "I'm not gonna remember. I'm gonna call you Jason."

Nick: It is definitely a power move.

Leah: That's what this person is doing. I don't care.

Nick: Yeah, I don't care. You're not important enough, and it doesn't matter to me. You don't matter. And names are so central to our identity, obviously. And so when you do this, you're really sending a signal about whether or not you respect this person or not.

Leah: And this has nothing to do with not being able to remember names. We get it.

Nick: Yeah, it is not that at all. Because if you really had trouble with that, you would make an effort or you would try to learn the names or you would just be like, "I'm so sorry, remind me your name."

Leah: Yeah. It's like, I know people with legitimate face blindness.

Nick: Right. And they wouldn't do that.

Leah: They wouldn't just be like, "I'm calling you Susie." They just wouldn't do that.

Nick: And the 'this is just how I am' defense? This is not good. This is not a get out of etiquette jail free card.

Leah: No, you only use that in a relationship when you're trying to get out of doing something, and you've been together so long and that's how they were when they met you.

Nick: Yeah. I just load the dishwasher this way. This is just how I am. [laughs]

Leah: [laughs] That's when you use that card.

Nick: And this is such a small office. I mean, 12 people with a photo directory on the website. I think this is an HR thing. HR needs to tell this person, "Hi, in this office we use everybody's first name. Here are some resources where you can learn them." Although somebody who acts like this, I don't know if they're gonna last in this office very long.

Leah: They're not gonna last that long. Let me tell you that.

Nick: So I guess maybe you can forget their name pretty soon.

Leah: They're not gonna last long anywhere. They're not lasting long anywhere.

Nick: Yeah. Yeah, not with this attitude.

Leah: It's disrespectful to people.

Nick: Yeah, at the end of the day, that's what this is. So our next question is, quote, "My husband received his King's Counsel designation and I'm throwing him a party. The venue has an insanely high minimum spend, so I want to make sure enough people attend this soirée. I've sent out invitations and I'm currently receiving responses, but I'm wondering, what is the etiquette on inviting a second round of people if necessary, to ensure that we have enough guests. Something in my soul tells me that this isn't acceptable."

Leah: Let me say congratulations to your husband up top.

Nick: Yes! King's Counsel, that's a big deal.

Leah: And my immediate question was, how would people know that you're on the second round of invites?

Nick: Isn't that astute, Leah? Yes, that is the key. You are allowed to have a B-list, but you are not allowed for your B-list to know that they're on the B-list.

Leah: And I thought—let me trot this out.

Nick: Okay.

Leah: Because it makes sense. Like, you obviously had to invite a certain group of people to this, and you want to fill the space.

Nick: Totally.

Leah: So if somebody knew, somehow figured out that they were in the second round of invites—which I cannot imagine—you could be like, "I had to invite all of his coworkers and then now finally I get to invite people that I wanted to come."

Nick: Ah, okay! Nice pivot. I mean, it would be so rude for somebody to be like, "Hi, I noticed that the date of my invitation was such and such, and I was speaking to someone else and their invitation was sent on this date. Explain to me the two-week difference."

Leah: Yeah, that would be wild.

Nick: That would be so wild! And even if somebody did figure it out, they know better than to bring it up. I mean, everybody knows this is required. You know, we're not on everybody's A-list.

Leah: Well, and also the list involves a lot of work politics.

Nick: Yes. Oh, for sure.

Leah: It's not personal. Like, if you're a friend and you're like, "I want you to come, but you know, the whole counsel's got to get there first."

Nick: Right? Yeah. So I think as long as you just don't bring up the idea that there's a second list or a second wave of invitations, send it out, no problem. Yeah.

Leah: Also, for somebody like me, probably one invitation will go out every six days. Like, I can't—there was no rhyme or reason.

Nick: You're a drip and drabber.

Leah: I am a drip and drabber.

Nick: Yeah.

Leah: You could just be like, "Hey, I have ADD. This is how it got out."

Nick: "Yeah, we did some drabs. You're part of the drab list." [laughs]

Leah: [laughs] "But I want you to be a drip."

Nick: "Yeah, please come drip with us." And it should not need to be said, but I'm gonna say it just in case it has to be said. But at no point are we mentioning the reason why I'm inviting you is because there's a minimum spend at the venue. So let's not talk about that part when we're inviting people.

Leah: Yeah, ever.

Nick: Ever. Right? And I feel like we don't have to say that, but ...

Leah: I mean, I'm sure our letter-writer knows that. I think it's always good just to say it for ...

Nick: Just want to say it.

Leah: ... other people.

Nick: Yes.

Leah: Who are not our listeners.

Nick: Yes. I just want to be on the record. We do not say anything about this.

Leah: And I hope it's the most wonderful night.

Nick: Indeed! And so lastly, I wanted to bring back the inserting-a-card-in-an-envelope topic. [laughs]

Leah: Wow! Okay.

Nick: Because in our last conversation, Leah, you opened up a Christmas card and you opened it up from the front.

Leah: Yes, I did.

Nick: And I think a question was: Do people open cards from the front or the back? And what does that mean for my entire identity and my worldview? And so we had a listener write in about this very topic.

Leah: Hit us with it, Nick.

Nick: And so, quote, "Of course, Leah, being an iconoclast, probably didn't use a letter opener during her demo. But you and I would. And in doing so, we would need to find the leading edge of the flap to slide the letter opener under, which is only visible from the back of the envelope. If we don't, we might miss the opening, and then we're just standing there waving a pointy object around and endangering everyone around us, which would be rude."

Leah: Okay.

Nick: So, letter-writer? So astute. Thank you so much. This is an excellent point. This is the entire point, that one opens envelopes from the back because one uses letter openers. And so that is proper, that is correct, that is what should be done. Surely if you're just using your opposable thumbs as Leah does, then sure, it doesn't matter. Rip it however you wish. But for the rest of us, the back is correct because we are using letter openers.

Leah: Okay.

Nick: [laughs] Leah is an iconoclast, and so there we are.

Leah: I'm so fine with being an iconoclast.

Nick: Oh, I knew you were in such a good place with this. Yes. You will not be getting a letter opener. You will not change the way you open mail. No, I get it.

Leah: And don't think that you're the first person that's tried to force a letter opener on me, because you are not.

Nick: Really? Someone has come before me?

Leah: Yes.

Nick: Who has attempted this?

Leah: Miss Melody D'Alessandro Bonnema tried to get me a letter opener for Christmas.

Nick: Oh, Mom tried to get you ...

Leah: Previous to Wolves!

Nick: Wow!

Leah: And I said, "Am I using this for stabbing people when they come through the door? Because I have fingers."

Nick: Okay. Well, I guess I wasn't the first. Maybe I won't be the last.

Leah: Don't you want to tear into your mail with excitement?

Nick: No. No, I don't want that. I want to savor the moment. It's like having a wonderful piece of cake. I want to take small bites so I can experience it and have it last as long as possible. I don't want to just shove an entire cupcake in my mouth in one go. That's what you're doing.

Leah: See, I think this is where we're coming to: how we like to experience things.

Nick: Okay. And you want to just jump in, experience it in a rush.

Leah: Just a raw emotional ...

Nick: Maybe I feel like I worry about being overwhelmed by the experience of opening an envelope. And so I want to make sure I pace myself to not overstimulate myself.

Leah: I say overwhelm me.

Nick: [laughs] Okay. So there you have it. I think we've settled this question. We open envelopes from the back because letter openers. So you out there, do you have any observations for us, or questions, vents, repents or anything else? Let us know! You can let us know through our website, WereYouRaisedBywWolves.com, or you can leave us a voicemail or send us a text message: (267) CALL-RBW. And we'll see you next time.

Leah: Bye!

Nick: Bye!